Imagine a virgin that’s been unconscious for four years, a wild and horny side kick, a cross-country road trip on less than $100 and the high school sweetheart who is now a lustrous centerfold. Add a raunchy rapper and a few ‘bunnies’ and it sounds like a recipe for a hilarious disaster, right? Guess again.

“Miss March” is a story of the young Eugene (Zach Cregger) getting ready to claim his manhood with his high school girlfriend, Cindi (Raquel Alessi), on prom night, but after a drunken mishap, awakes four years later to find everything has changed. His father has moved away and, to his utter disgust, his once innocent girlfriend is the March centerfold in Playboy magazine. In fact, the only person that hasn’t changed is his sex-crazed best friend Tucker, (Trevor Moore) who is still as spontaneous, immature and devoutly obsessed to anything with boobs as he was before Eugene’s accident.

Tucker, captivated by the idea of a mansion full of half-naked models, cooks up the idea to travel across country to the Playboy mansion to confront Eugene’s former flame. Eugene’s recovery time is cut short after a biting/fork-to-the-face encounter Tucker has with his epileptic girlfriend, Candace (Molly Stanton). Now, not only are Eugene and Tucker racing against the clock to get to the mansion in time for the annual party, but also outrunning Candace’s fireman brother and his band of testosterone-blazing buddies.

Although the film will squeeze a few laughs, most of the jokes are severely inflated and unoriginal. For instance, when Tucker begins to smoke a pipe next to long curtains, it won’t take a genius to guess that a fire will follow. Or that a puppy itching to pee next to a champagne glass will result in an interesting cocktail. It is mainly a series of quips and puns that attempt to cover the movie’s sheer predictability. When the funniest part of the film is that the main character can’t control his bowel movements, that usually indicates a problem.

However, the movie is made refreshing by the loveable hopelessness Cregger brings to his character and the audience will feel a sense of satisfaction after the ending reveals the true motives behind Cindi’s sexy shoots.

Sadly, the feel-good sentiments are dismal and few and far between, as the true essence of “Miss March” is corny, cliché and overplayed.